Wedding stationery in the right order, from save the dates to thank yous
What to send, when to send it, and what it all needs to say. The paper trail of a wedding, without the panic.
Wedding stationery runs on a timetable, and once you know it, the whole thing becomes a series of small, pleasant jobs instead of one looming one.
Save the dates: eight to twelve months out
These exist for one reason: to claim the date before diaries fill. Send them as soon as the venue is booked if you marry in high season, if your date sits near a holiday, or if guests will travel. Name, date, place, and the words invitation to follow. Nothing else. A short engagement can skip them entirely.
Invitations: three to four months out
The invitation carries the load. Names, venue, arrival time, and how to reply, plus the details people genuinely need: dress code if you have one, whether children are invited, and where to stay if guests are travelling. Set the reply date four to six weeks before the wedding, which is when caterers want final numbers. A wedding website takes the overflow beautifully, gift registry, taxi numbers, the running order, so the printed piece stays clean.
The reply problem
Whatever method you choose, a third of your guests will need chasing. This is a law of nature, not a reflection on your friends. Give the chasing job to someone organised and slightly fearless, and start a fortnight before the deadline, not after it.
On the day
An order of service for a ceremony with structure, a seating plan people can read from a metre away, and place names. Menus are lovely and optional. If the budget is tight, this is the layer to trim, because nobody has ever left a wedding talking about the menu card.
Afterwards: the thank yous
Send them within three months, handwritten, and mention the actual gift. Three sentences is plenty. If the pile frightens you, do five a night with a drink and it is done in a fortnight.
A last word on ordering: whatever quantity you calculate, add ten percent. Spare invitations cover mistakes, late additions, and the one your mother wants for the drawer she keeps things in.
